Friday, November 12, 2010

NFL Weekend Preview: Week 10

A photo of the Lions vs. the Bills, because bad teams need love too.

This is the final week of bye weeks, which means after this Sunday, we'll have a full slate of games each week AND Thursday games from now on. This makes me happy, because more football is more better. Here is the final short slate, and exactly how the games will go...except probably not. But humor me, anyway.

Lions at Bills – Every thing in my wants to predict that the Bills finally get over the hump and put it to the Lions and get into the win column for the first time this season, but the Lions feel better than 2-6, and I think they will beat Buffalo. I’m sorry, Buffalo. - Lions 33 Bills 27

Vikings at Bears – Favre has announced officially that this is his final season. Which means it’s at least a 30% chance this is his final game in Soldier Field. I think the Bears send him off as a loser in his final trip there, be it Sunday, or three years from now. - Bears 21 Vikings 17

Jets at Browns – The Browns are on fire after taking down powerhouses New Orleans and New England. Do they take down their third straight team that starts with “New” on Sunday? Sure, why not. The Brownies are powerhouses against “New” teams. - Browns 26 Jets 19

Panthers at Buccaneers – The Bucs think they are the best team in the NFC. They are wrong, but they are miles ahead of this divisional rival. The Panthers are so terrible that they omit a foul smell, sure, you can say that’s gym socks in the locker room, but it’s not…The players literally* have the stink of failure on them. (*This is not true.) – Buccaneers 30 Panthers 10

Texans at Jaguars – I have zero interest in this game. Just none. Perhaps it’ll turn out to be a barnburner, but ahead of time, I’ve got nothing. So, I wanted to pose a question into the blogosphere for anyone to answer if they feel inclined. Does anyone eat breakfast at Subway? I know they are non-stop pumping out ads of late for their delicious breakfasts, but I have never once thought to myself in the morning. Hey, I’m going to stop at Subway for breakfast. Have you tried it? Is it good? Why are they serving breakfast? I’m so confused by the whole Subway for breakfast movement. Anyway…- Texans 21 Jaguars 10

Bengals at Colts – When people bring up Carson Palmer and his struggles, they inevitably say that he’s coming back from a knee injury. While I realize that knee injuries are tough and require some serious time back…his injury happened January 8th, 2006. We’re almost FIVE YEARS REMOVED FROM IT!!! Perhaps if he’s struggling now, it’s because he’s not any good anymore, not that he needs a bit more rehab. The Colts are beat up, but the Bengals have listed their psyche on the injury report as “Doubtful.” Colts big. - Colts 34 Bengals 19

Titans at Dolphins – Randy Moss makes his Titans debut, whilst the Dolphins debut a new Chad that is also their old Chad. Can Pennington lead in his Chadlike way in an area where Henne’s Chadness failed? Also, how ironic is it that if any city in the league were to have two quarterbacks named Chad that it would be Miami, a place that became very well known for hanging Chads in the 2000 election? Oh yeah, the pick. - Titans 27 Dolphins 23

Chiefs at Broncos – When last we saw the Broncos at Invesco Field, they were getting drubbed by 45 against Oakland. Thankfully the City of Denver has had a few weeks to process this, and although our confidence is shattered, we’re still going to hope for the best in this one. I’ll be there clad in orange and blue and as of this moment at least, feeling oddly confident. The Chiefs are better than the Broncos, but Denver is due. God, I hope they are due. - Broncos 20 Chiefs 16

Cowboys at Giants – The Cowboys did not care last Sunday night, as they lost by 38 to Green Bay. It was obvious they weren’t trying for Wade Phillips, and I have a hard time believing they are going to start caring a whole lot more for Jason Garrett. They keep it slightly closer, but the Giants are a better team that actually cares about trying to win right now. The Cowboys are a lost cause this year. Giants 31 Cowboys 17

Seahawks at Cardinals – Is it easier to bounce back from a monumental collapse or being manhandled? The Seahawks were drop kicked at home by the Giants 41-7, while the Cardinals inepted (Yes, I just made that word up.) away a late fourth quarter 14 point lead to the Vikings. Neither of these birds are any good, so let’s give the edge to the home team since someone has to win. (Technically, a tie is a possibility, so someone DOESN’T have to win, but I don’t feel like being so cheeky as to predict a tie.) - Cardinals 19 Seahawks 16

Rams at 49ers – The Rams, also known as the team I like to win the NFC West, head to Northern California to try and put a rather sizable nail in the coffin of the 49ers. Odd as it seems, the should the Niners win this game they could be as close as 1 game back of the division lead. Perhaps San Francisco owner Jed York won’t seem as crazy as he did when he announced the 49ers would win the division the day after the team fell to 0-5. Although, the Niners aren’t very good, so my money is still on that sounding crazy. - Rams 20 49ers 13

Patriots at Steelers – Clearly the game of the week, here. The winner puts themselves into excellent position in the AFC, plus we get the added bonus of hearing each team’s fans debating which franchise was the “Team of the Aughts” which is always fun. The Patriots are back to their “winning while the other team scratches it’s head wondering how it lost” ways of the pre-Randy Moss era. I feel like the Steelers may be scratching their heads come Monday morning. - Patriots 21 Steelers 17

Eagles at Redskins – If there is any team in the NFC that I want to see as much as possible right now, and whom I would love to advance deep through the playoffs to the Super Bowl, it’s the Philadelphia Eagles. And for one reason: Mike Vick. I know he’s a bad man whom PETA types will always consider an enemy of their loopy state, but when he’s in the open field running around, that man is flat-out entertaining. And if Iike any type of entertainment, flat-out entertainment is right at the top. On the other end of the field, it will be interesting to watch to see who my man Mike Shanahan can alienate this week. We should put together a bingo card with the names of all the most talented players on the Redskins and play along. If you place your mark on Chris Cooley, you can just hope that some sort of anti-tight end sentiment gets expressed by Shanny and watch the sparks fly PLUS you’d win a prize. Sounds great to me! – Eagles 33 Redskins 20

Week 10 Thursday Night: 1-0
Season to Date: 74-57

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